Article by Haripriya Suraj, Reiki Master
There are countless triggers that push our anger buttons. Rude people, insensitivity, haughtiness, indifference of loved ones, nagging children, overbearing families and the list can go on and on.
However, not all of us have been trained to handle our anger well. Some of us are afraid to face our anger. So, we suppress it and pretend it does not exist. And some of us explode and lose all control when angry. To make things worse, we also feel ashamed about our lack of control on our own selves.
We can do ourselves a huge favour by finding better ways to cope when angry.
The first thing we need to learn is to not suppress our anger. Suppressing anger puts undue pressure on us. Anger is nothing to be ashamed of. We are all human and we are bound to feel angry at times. If you were taught as a child that it is not OK to get angry, discard that belief now. Our well wishers certainly had good intentions while teaching us not to feel angry. However, not feeling anger isn’t the healthiest option for emotional development. A healthier option is to feel your anger and express it appropriately.
Anger that is felt repeatedly at a certain person or situation causes a build up of toxic energy in our system. If this energy does not have an outlet, it is sure to explode one day. It would be wise to release this energy before it explodes and causes bigger problems.
There are ways to express and heal anger that has turned toxic as well as to heal anger that is non-toxic. Some techniques are described below.
Expressing Toxic Anger
The following techniques are most useful for expressing anger that is so intense that it feels like a huge load in your energy field. The load may be so strong that it is difficult to shake off with gentle healing. The energy associated with such anger can be released physically in a safe manner first, after which it becomes easier to heal the wounds created by it. There are two ways to go about this.
- Choose a space that is safe and private (possibly your bedroom). Pick a cushion or a pillow. To express your anger, you can either punch the pillow itself or hit the bed with it. Let go of all inhibitions and feel the anger fully as you punch. There is no one around to judge you. As you punch, verbally express everything that has made you angry. For instance, if you are angry with someone, express all the reasons you are angry. Do not worry about whether what you say is justified or not. This is not the time to analyse if you are right or feel guilty. Just get the anger out of your system first. Scream, shout, jump! Do anything that will help you release the pent up energy. Just make sure you do not hurt yourself in the process.
- If you are not able to express anger as described above or you lack privacy at home, you can use paper and crayons instead. Feel you anger and scribble hard on the paper with all the colours of your choice. Verbally express (softly but intensely) all that you feel as you scribble.
No matter which of the above options you choose, continue doing the exercise until you feel a sense of relief. You can stop when you get the feeling that a load is off your chest. Drink plenty of water and get some rest.
Filling up with Love
Once you are calm and back to normal, reflect on the experience. Make a note of all that you expressed while venting out your anger.
If you do the exercise thoroughly and with no inhibitions, you will end up expressing the deepest reason for your anger. No matter what the reason may appear to be on the surface, the deepest reason for all anger is usually to do with love. It could be that you feel unloved, unappreciated, uncared for or unable to love. Your next task is to fill yourself up with the love that is missing.
Remember, love is the core of our Being. It just takes time for us to remember this and live it. We do not have to depend on others to make us feel loved. This is a profound spiritual lesson. It can be hard to fill ourselves up with our own love when we have just recovered from an outburst of anger. So, we can take the assistance of our Reiki guides and angels. Our Guides and Angels are so full of love that we can literally borrow some love from them whenever we feel its lack in our lives.
Lie down comfortably and request your Angels and Reiki Guides to surround you. See them holding a green balm of love and applying it gently to your heart chakra. It is the heart that is most affected when we feel anger or a lack of love. Absorb this balm until your heart chakra feels whole. Thank your Guides and Angels. Do a full body Reiki healing and relax.
Expressing Non-Toxic Anger
Milder forms of anger triggered by one time incidents and minor annoyances do not require such intense expression as described above. To heal anger that is less intense, all you need to do is accept it and give it space to be.
Here’s how you do it-
Lie down comfortably. Identify the part of the body where you feel the anger. Place your palm over it, start the flow of Reiki and say with love.
Keep saying it until you feel better. This acknowledgement of the anger is more than enough to heal it.
Doing these exercises will help you face your own anger and bring it to the light. Once it is brought to the light, it can be healed. You will not need to fear anger anymore. You can express it safely in your own space and also receive love and help from your Guides and Angels. Once the toxic energy is out of your system and you have healed yourself with love, you gain more clarity on the situations that triggered your anger. You will begin to feel different about them. You will experience more freedom and not feel like a victim of circumstances anymore. You will also be able to take any action that is necessary to improve your life rather than suffer needlessly with toxic anger.
Lots of love to you ☺
Haripriya Suraj is a Reiki Master, Angel Healer, and Spiritual Teacher. She was drawn to Reiki right from her childhood and Reiki went on to become part of her life’s purpose. Reiki is her constant companion from which she derives peace and contentment. She is also deeply connected with the angels, with Angel Healing being an integral part of her Reiki practice. After reaping the fruits of Reiki practice in her life, she was inspired to spread the joy of Reiki and the light of the Angels. Haripriya offers courses in Reiki and Angel Healing as well as distance healing services. She resides in Bangalore, India. Reach Haripriya at firstname.lastname@example.org and Angel Light on Facebook.