Article by Tammy Hatherill, Reiki Master
Some of you may have been following my articles and if that’s the case you will have read a story about a fall out with one Reiki Master, in my home town in 2013, which has had a cascading affect with her talking to her own Reiki Master who we’ll call Jane (the one who taught me level 1 and level 2) and thus a flow on affect from there. Even though I never voiced this woman’s name after the fall out (my belief and integrity that the disagreement was between her and me), she slandered me throughout the Reiki community.
For me it was ‘obvious’ that I had been spoken about and cut off because of the abilities I possess, being clairsentient I could ‘feel’ it. With my claircognisance I just “knew” it, and with my higher self known as Tamnisha (a viking warrior woman) telling me, and passing along inside information. It was horrible and uncomfortable for me to know, that even though the disagreement was with one woman, the entire Reiki community whom I used to belong, now had a one sided story, and I was condemned. The feeling was physical as well as emotional. So I dug deep and looked for my lessons in all of it. Everything has a lesson. Every horrible event gives us cause to grow and expand if we look it as a lesson, rather than the end of the world.
I had one Master who runs a naturopathy business, throw out my business cards. She holds the cards of most of the people who have completed their Reiki through Jane. I gave her some of my cards, and then after this fall out, on my next visit, my cards were missing. I emailed her on my return home, asking that if she didn’t want them, she was free to return them. Her response was she had given them all out. Not true! This was a blatant lie, because the amount given to her, far exceeded the number of the others still on display. These others were closer friends to the naturopath than me and so those cards would go first. She was telling me a blatant untruth.
I meditated on this and received the same information. What confounded this truth was the ‘over compensation’ that occurred afterward. This woman kept asking me for my cards, to give out. My back ground is intelligence and investigations, having worked for years dealing with people telling lies and untruths, and how they over compensate when caught out. So I KNOW without a doubt, she had thrown out my cards. Thus, my fall out with one Reiki Master in the Usui Shiki Ryoho system, had permeated through to the others of that group. This was just the beginning for me. How can they think this is loving and caring or following the basic principles of Reiki?
I have mentioned in a few comments of other articles, how I attended an unrelated course about Angel frequency and angelic stuff a few months later. Well this was a huge eye opener for me. Spirit was trying to keep me away. As I had a sick feeling about attending. My intuition was warning this course wasn’t for me. But I over rode the feeling and attended anyway. On the first day, I was an hour late. This was my error as I truly thought it commenced at 10am on the Saturday as it was on the Sunday, and so I texted the facilitator to say ‘where is everyone’ when no one was at the meeting point? I never heard from her, so I found my way to the room, and snuck in.
Wowzers, I walked into a room of emotion and pain. Being clairsentient I FEEL things so strongly and as everyone was seated in a circle, discussing some very painful experiences; I walked into a wall of pain. The only available place to sit was next to the naturopath who I suspected lied to me. I snuck in and quietly sad down. Then about five minutes later that facilitator (who was staying with Jane during her visit) says in a somewhat unpleasant voice, “Ohh can someone go outside and get Tammy, she’s still sitting by the pool area.” She had not noticed me creep in and sit down. Her tone and voice was disturbing to me. She must have realised, because a little later she apologised for how she spoke.
So, a great start to this course. I was uncomfortable all day, because Jane, the master whom taught me level 1 and level 2 was also present, and was the only one sitting on a chair, the rest of us were sitting on the floor. She was the only one who didn’t fully participate in the course, and it still irked me that she talks right over the top of people. This had been something I was aware of, from the moment I met her, that she had the tendency to speak right over the top of others.
Dreading the next day of the course, I sent Reiki to the future. I sent Reiki to the past. On the day of the course, I bathed in Reiki symbols and I, set the symbols over the doorway of the course, so when I walked through I was being Reikied as I entered.
It was this second day, that was the most painful and most hurtful. I overheard Jane and the naturopath talking about using the power of Reiki symbols to keep me from going to the naturopath for treatment. This was devastating. Well they got their wish, but it wasn’t the power of the Reiki symbols that kept me from returning to her for my health needs, it was the fact that A) I had been lied to, and B) I heard them talking about wanting to keep me away. They were also discussing how they couldn’t understand why I kept attending appt’s because the Reiki should have kept me away. How extremely hurtful.
The pain didn’t stop there. I then overheard Jane, the naturopath and another Reiki Master, talking and discussing an upcoming Reiki Master Meditation night. There was a new woman to our area, who was a Master but from another lineage. They were considering if they should invite her along or not. I was sitting only a few feet from them. I was not invited.
Has anyone ever been through ostracisation and being left out, because of a fall out with one person? That permeates through a group? It’s a horrendous and horrible feeling. YES I can put my hand up and say, that during the disagreement I behaved un-reiki like in my reaction. However I didn’t continue it along, I did not speak this woman’s name, I did not slander her, I did not tell lies about harassment and stalking as she did about me. All I had done for this woman, was assist her with learning the Tarot (she was a student of mine), introduced her to her fiancé, and introduced her to a friend of mine, so she could apply for a job with him. Which she got!! I had done all these wonderful and life changing things for her, and over one disagreement and one display of anger from me, and she slandered me, spoke untruths and changed my entire Reiki experience. What a lesson for me!!! I feel good though that everything good in her life, I played a significant part. I don’t hold grudges as this woman has lesson to learn as well.
So the past year has been about learning and growing for me. It’s been interesting to say the least. What’s happened for me though is my business has exploded in ways I never realised!!! It has grown and expanded beyond my wildest imagination. I am international now, and involved in using my journalism to write articles, I’ve got a regular gig on the radio, and now another international opportunity has come up.
With this opportunity, I contacted most of the local Reiki and spiritual, and healthy businesses to see if they wished to become involved. Even though some of them had hurt me beyond belief I wasn’t holding grudges and I wasn’t angry or upset any longer. I had learned my big lesson, and that was I was more an independent operator and wasn’t interested in groups or cliques and I wasn’t supposed to fit in with them. However I was still willing to invite them to join this opportunity.
One responded with great enthusiasm, and it was the perfect time for me to bring up the feelings of the past. I wrote the following (I’ve only changed the names to protect identity):
“Reading your email has lifted my spirits as I’ve never addressed this with you, but will do so now. It really, and truly hurt me, when you, the naturopath and Jane, were discussing and talking about an upcoming Masters Meditation and were considering inviting a new person (to Darwin) along to it, even though she was a master from another lineage. This was at Tracey’s course last year. I’ll never forget sitting a few feet from the three of you, over hearing it, and being sad at my ostracisim (and knowing the probably reason for it). Just to let you know, I’ve dealt with the issues but am surprised with how some of you have behaved towards me, since the fall out with one. End of story. I’m not going to carry it on as I’ve dealt with it, but never openly discussed the hurt caused by you and the others, especially when I never have and never will hurt so cruelly through ostracisation. This is not written to cause you pain, but just to highlight I’ve lived with it for nearly 12 months and can now thank everyone for the wonderful lessons (not at the time though).. listening to the three of you openly discussing this new master to Darwin and debating whether you should invite her or not, and knowing I was sitting there and ‘not good enough’ for your group, was hard.”
She responded that she was aware of Jane having an issue with me, which she said was caused by an incident that caused consternation, that she was sorry for the hurt she caused me unintentionally and that she loved me , however she felt the energy has now shifted between us, and she no longer wished to participate and unsubscribed from my emails. Feel free to make up your own minds about this. I know how and what I feel about it.
Over the past few weeks I have tried to contact Jane the original Master, for some feedback and assistance with obtaining more information about non-traditional symbols that she teaches, and also to gain some clarification on the consternation she feels towards me. However my contact has been ignored. So I can’t clear that up or obtain answers. I will resort to meditation and using Reiki to once again help me through this.
So the moral of this article is that even though people are trained as Reiki Practitioners and Reiki Masters, massive disagreements and difference of opinions can and do occur. I’m not perfect by any means (and I’ve never claimed to be), however I know my morals and ethics. I would never ever treat a fellow human being in the manner I have been treated, REGARDLESS of any fallout or history. I never decide my opinion on another person based on stories from another. I get to know a person myself and base my opinions on that. I would never intentionally be cruel or exclude. I am proud of myself that at the time I never ever mentioned the woman’s name whom I had the fall out with, and feel that her need to talk and express her truth to others, naming me reflects her integrity.
It’s been a wonderful learning for me and even though it’s been painful and very very emotional, the lessons are profound. I am able to stand with my head held high and know I’ve learned all I need to from them, and how I would never treat my students and people in general. They need to feel proud with their actions and behaviors as well and if they do in this regard, I think that speak volumes.
Reiki any situation that hurts. Self Reiki and self-care is important. I haven’t lost faith in Reiki, as I feel my own business is booming and exploding for a reason and this is what I concentrate on. If I was still involved with that particular group, perhaps things wouldn’t be going so well for me. Everything happens for a reason.
I hold no grudges, no resentment and no ill feeling. I forgive them all and forgave long ago. They have lessons to learn as well. However I will always, always speak my truth and speak about how things ‘feel’ for me and if people don’t like my reality, that’s OK. They don’t have to. Always keep true to yourself, and please don’t cave into peer pressure. Make up your own minds using your own experience and evidence, and please, please don’t be cruel to people.
Big warm hugs to everyone.
Love, light and harmony.
Tammy Hatherill is the owner/operator of Tammy’s Tarot and Healing. She is a well known Tarot and and Reiki Master/Teacher, and shared her love of tarot for over 12 months with a regular radio segment on 104.1 Territory FM. Tammy is the author of two books: Trapped Behind Bars and The Diary of a Fallen Angel, and is a journalist for numerous organisation: Reiki Rays, Tiny Buddha, Personal Growth and Hypnotherapy Journal Australia. You can find her website at www.tammystarotandhealing.com
and facebook: https://www.facebook.com/tammystarotandhealing/