Grief, Wounds and Reiki – Part 4 of 5

It has been a couple years since I last wrote like this. Parts 1-3 almost flew out of me. The final 2 parts, never seemed quite right for me to submit. Something that has been valuable on my journey, is really embracing that everything happens in divine right timing.

When we talk of grief, wounds and Reiki, we should also discuss the power of love, connection and Reiki in our healing journey. Healing grief, trauma or other wounds is a journey with no set timeframe or timeline. Even when you feel resolved and at peace with someone or a situation, you never know when something might pop up again looking to be held, acknowledged, released, healed at a deeper level, or let go.

This journey involves a dog by the name of Sadie. This is the most loving, affectionate, full of energy, love of life dog you would ever meet. My love for her is beyond words and the grief I felt at her passing was so powerful and a testament to the love and bond we share, which grew deeper with Reiki. Though the healing she offered me through our love in combination with Reiki’s healing energy, I would have never thought possible.

This sweet girl, was a senior in dog years and had overcome many odds. Like running into the street as a puppy and being hit by a car. In the last year of her life, beating the odds of cancer and losing a leg in the process of cancer, gifting her another year on this earth plane. For much of it, she could get around quite well on her 3 legs as in her heart she was still a puppy.

Going back pre-cancer, as she got older, the more she would run, chase a ball, play with my kiddos, her leg that was injured as a puppy would sometimes give out on her. Like I said she was full of life and she would often push herself too far. I still remember the first time I asked her permission to give her Reiki and exactly where we were. I feel it is so important to connect with the animal and receive their permission before giving them Reiki and her acceptance of Reiki was always loud and clear. I was also surprised at how quickly she would recover with the support of Reiki’s healing energy. Though as she aged, her recovery time took a little longer and our sessions increased in length as well. Sadie’s and my bond continued to grow and she understood the word Reiki, like walk or car ride. I had sent her Reiki via distance, but she loved receiving it in person and she showered me with affectionate kisses on my hands while I would place my hands on her as Reiki flowed. It sort of became a part of the visits with my mom or mom & step-dad, dedicating some Reiki time for Sadie in this way.

The last year of her life, we could really see her age was catching up with her, which did not match her puppy personality and zest and love of life. The weekend before my parents had a vet appointment scheduled for her, my kids and I went up for a visit that ended up being overnight. I knew her time was coming soon, I could just feel it. The Reiki that I had been doing on her over the years seemed to connect us on a different, very intuitive level. I could feel changes over time like pain she was feeling and hiding so very well, as well visually we could all see her body was becoming tired. That weekend all I wanted to do was support her in any way I could until her appointment with the vet. I had that knowing and feeling her life force energy was dwindling, and that the cancer had spread internal and that would be the last time we would see her. Though I kept hoping none of that would be true, but what I had intuitively known and felt, was confirmed at her vet appointment a couple days later.

Our final weekend together Sadie had 3 mini Reiki sessions with me and at some point after the first I got a bleeding nose. It was not like any of my regular bleeding noses I had experienced in my lifetime, it was unique, like nothing I had ever experienced before. Later that night, before bed she and I had another little Reiki session. After I had gone to sleep, early in the morning I woke to another unique small bleeding nose. Both occurrences were on the left side only, so I knew some sort of energetic shift was happening within my own body and associated with the feminine side, which also made me think of my mom and Sadie. As well, while observing what was happening in my own body, aside from grief, love and energy, I remembered a time a few years back someone I hadn’t seen in years had a huge nose bleed experience and then I recalled at that time I felt it being a big release of energy as there were so many emotions, grief and love intermingled together in that experience too.

Before I left my parent’s house the next day, Sadie and I had our final Reiki session. We could see the difference in her visually, as well I could feel it energetically. She had no more kisses to offer me and my kids had to really work hard for their last goodbye kiss from her. The way she looked at me and the way her eyes looked, will be forever etched in my memory.

I shared with my husband all that had happened and all the pieces fell together. I started to gain more clarity and insight to my two small nose bleeds and I feel that more even came to light in the coming days. My abandonment issues/wounds, which I always thought originated at my dad’s passing as a young child, over the years more and more I saw themes with my mom or things happen with children crying for their mom and how it would affect me. I was separated from my mom and brother, by a choice my dad made when I was little while they separated and part of my healing journey has been to work through multiple abandonment wounds as an adult, as these experiences happened to me before the age of 6. All the private details don’t need to be shared, but I do wish to share that I do not have any ill feelings towards my dad or my mom in regards to how abandonment shaped my journey. Abandonment wounds is a theme within my family, ancestral healing and part of my learning and growth here as Jennifer. Though there were times over the years I did feel lots of anger, grief, depression, a lack of self worth and many other feelings and emotions.

Though in this particular case with Sadie (the dog) and my mom, I was reminded by my husband how angry I was that my mom got Sadie when she did, as I was struggling with my first child and needed extra support at that time in my life. Though the events happened as they did, and it was one of the catalysts to me beginning my healing journey, Reiki entering my path and the healing journey my mom and I have gone through separately and at times together.

There are so many gifts that have been given to me, by the dog (then puppy) I was so angry about. Sadie became one of the biggest loves of my life and taught me about unconditional love. She gifted me a healing (10 or so years later) in helping to shift and release any leftover anger and sadness I was still holding onto from all those years ago, with the support of Reiki’s loving, healing energy. An anger I had forgotten, and never realized a part was still there and stuck within my body. This experience really shows how trauma, wounds and emotions can get trapped in your body and how with the support of Reiki, the energy can shift, flow and be released even after many years has passed. This is the beautiful, unexpected gift that love and Reiki supported and offered Sadie and I individually and in our connectedness. We both had pain, mine tied to my emotional wounds and Sadie’s physical wounds and eiki held space and supported both of us through these reiki sessions.

As some tears roll down my face as I write about this unbelievable healing journey I experienced with and because of a beautiful Border Collie named Sadie, I keep zoning to the words forgiveness and compassion on the picture I have above my desk and it feels a fitting way to bring closure to this article to share these words with all of you.

• Grief, Wounds & Reiki – Part 1 of 5
• Grief, Wounds and Reiki – Part 2 of 5
• Grief, Wounds and Reiki – Part 3 of 5

Article by Jennifer Cluley

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Jennifer Cluley is a Reiki Master, Certified Meditation & Birth Star Mantra Teacher, Intuitive and Guide. Jennifer’s passion is to inspire others to connect to their heart to bring more balance, peace, love, forgiveness and harmony within, which then ripples into the home and out into the world. Jennifer’s anchor is Reiki and her meditation practice, her guide, which continues to assist her healing journey and guiding and assisting others who connect with her. A better understanding of ourselves and our connections with those we love, ultimately brings more harmony in the home. Jennifer’s children are her biggest motivators, her angels, guides and loved ones in spirit provide an abundance of support and many family and friends are her biggest sources of inspiration to lead a spirit led life.

Connect with Jennifer:
Website: jencluley.com
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